“For every Way there’s a way of following that Way that’s fun” 
Combatives (and reality self defence training in general) is a serious business.
Or at least, that’s how it comes across. All that talk about violently smashing, pounding, gouging another human being, hurting them, often severely. Occasionally killing them. Talk of do or die, kill or be killed.
It’s all very…well, violent.
But just because training is based around violence and counter-violence, doesn’t mean we can’t still have a bit of fun.
And fun is the one thing that many of us (myself included) are sometimes guilty of forgetting about. We forget to have fun.
Just because it’s fun we’re talking about, doesn’t make it any less important, especially in training. Even more especially in your life.
Most people underestimate the importance of fun, as well as misunderstanding what fun is all about.
When we talk about fun, we are talking about enjoying and being excited by what we do, not necessarily mindless fun, or fun for the sake of it (like with two hookers in a Jacuzzi in Vegas kind of fun), but fun in striving to accomplish our goals, in working towards something important to us, important to our growth as individuals (some would argue that the experience of having two hookers in a Jacuzzi in Vegas is vital to ones growth as well…those people may have a point
).
The Definition Of Fun
Our definition of fun in this context comes from Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi’s work on the psychological state called “flow.” His concept of fun has many components to it, including the following:
- The activity matches challenges with ability.
- Focus on the task is required.
- Focus is possible because there are clear-cut goals and immediate feedback.
- The worries and frustrations of life do not intrude.
- There is a sense of control over actions.
- Self-consciousness is absent.
- The sense of self is stronger after the activity.
- The sense of time is altered.
Training can often be gruelling and extremely uncomfortable on all levels, and if you were to ask someone after one of these hard sessions, what was your experience of it, they would likely reply, “Fantastic, just not at the time.”
The implication here is that although the activity was not at every moment totally pleasurable, the overall experience was uplifting. Enriching even.
You may frequently experience pain, extreme fatigue, nagging injuries, or severe disappointment as a result of your training activities, but you go back to them because you find them rewarding overall.
This was a revelation to me when I first discovered this truth. It made doing the hard things easier. I knew the rewards and the positive emotions and changes that I would feel after doing the hard things would be worth the pain of doing them.
Process Over Outcome
This philosophy doesn’t just apply to training, it also applies to any activity that you may find difficult in life, but which will yield the most growth for you. I’ll give you an example from my own life.
You may have seen the videos that I have posted here recently. Making those videos, for me, was an often-times very uncomfortable process. I tend to communicate better in literally rather than verbally (though I’m working on it), so to stand in front of a camera and communicate my ideas in a clear and concise way was quite a stretch for me. The videos I have done so far are by no means perfect, but that’s beside the point.
The point is the process. It was in the process of actually making those videos that I gained the most from, not in the actual finished products.
I know I’ll get better at doing videos over time because I have faith in the creative process.
But the experience of making them is the real reward, providing me with an uplifting experience that transcends any initial discomfort.
The point I’m making here is that process goals in training are better than outcome based goals when it comes to enjoying what you do and having fun along the way.
Process Goals
Process goals in training include demonstrating competence, creatively expressing oneself, improving one’s self-image, feeling the joy of skilled movement, testing one’s ability (through pressure testing), and, perhaps most important, experiencing fun.
Fun is a major motivational factor for continued persistence in any activity.
One study has also shown that some people are better able to experience fun than others. This occurs when-as a result of genetics or training-they have better control of their mental energies and are better able to focus their attention on the tasks to be done; they are able to set process goals instead of only outcome goals; they have a higher level of self-confidence and learned optimism; and they are less distracted by physical discomfort.
These are the traits you will want to exhibit also if you wish to get the most from your training.
World class performers recognise the importance of fun in what they do. Look at any top performer and you will see that despite how hard they work, despite how challenged they are, despite how under pressure they often are, they still manage to enjoy what they do– they still have fun! Probably more fun than someone who has less stress and strain in their life.
The closer to the edge you walk, the scarier it may be; but the more exciting it is and the more fun it is as well.
“When you have confidence, you can have a lot of fun, and when you have fun, you can do amazing things.” Joe Namath (Professional Football Player)
World class performers make having fun a priority. They also know that to have the most fun they have to push themselves and take risks.
However, you can only really push yourself and take risks if you are passionate about what you do, if you enjoy what you do.
The discomfort must be worth it to you in some way.
If you enjoy what you do then it is easy to have a laugh and joke during training. When you can do that, learning becomes easier and, you guessed it, more fun.
Al Peasland is one of the best instructors I know. When I trained with Al (along with Mick Tully) on a few occasions the first thing that struck me about his sessions (and what stayed with me about them) was how fun they were. Everything was kept very light-hearted and class participants were actively encouraged to have fun. Those sessions were some of the most enjoyable I’ve had, largely down to Al’s (and Mick Tully’s) insistence on making the training fun, as well as informative.
There is no doubt that we all take ourselves a little too seriously at times. What we should be doing is taking the training seriously and not ourselves. In this way, we will make the most progress and have the most fun.
We are only here for a short time, right? We might as well enjoy it while we can.
And the next time you find yourself taking things too seriously or sweating over the small stuff, just remember….
And finally, a quote from George Bernard Shaw:
“We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.”
We’d all do well to keep that in mind at all times.
Oh, and by the way…
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It stands to reason that if you’re doing something you really dislike and there’s no stronger motive for you to keep at it (the need to make a living for example) sooner or later you’re going to quit. Martial arts or self-defense training is no different: you may start to train to keep fit or to learn how to defend yourself but if you ‘re not having fun it’s not likely these reasons will be enough to keep you in training for a significant amount of time. As a trainer or instructor there are certain things you can do to improve the quality of your classes (keep students busy, explain them the purpose of an exercise, be lighthearted, keep practice varied…) but on the other hand there must be intrinsic motivation on the part of the student (if they like some sort of sport or activity better then there’s really nothing you can do about it) and like some many things in life the quality of an activity is largely determined by your effort and attitude: if you’re lazy and talk all the time obviously the essence of an exercise (sparring, hitting pads, blocking exercises….) is going to be lost on you: it really is for the best (yours, theirs and the other students) they quit asap. Once we’ve had a girl who was such a pain in the ass (always complaining, couldn’t handle any contact at all, always knew better….) there was an almost audible collective sigh of relief when she left. The funny thing was that even though she thought she knew better she really was quite incompetent (apparantly she was some sort of taekwondo-champion but her punching was crappy at best and her fighting style would have rapidly proved obsolete in any real altercation): when you’re not willing to listen to what people have to say (especially someone as experienced and competent as my teacher) and empty your cup just do everybody a favour (including yourself) and stay the hell away as you’re likely only ruin the fun for everbody.
When I’m training I’m not thinking about having to be or get good enough to beat the crap out thugs and the like: I just try to do the best I can, assist my fellow-students as best as I can and just go along with everything without overthinking it. There have been times (quite frequently actually) where I was so caught up in the moment everything felt right and there’s really nothing like the exhiliration of forgetting one’s ego and being totally absorbed by whatever one happens to be doing at that time.
We’ve had people like the girl you mentioned. We couldn’t wait till they inevitably quit. Pain in the ass, as you say, especially when they expect the whole class to revolve around them.
Training is one of the few things that truely keeps you in the present moment, which is why so many people like it so much. I love that side of it. The more in the moment I am, the more fun I end up having and the more I end up learning. It’s win win.
Indeed, this is especially true in high stress or technically difficult exercises. In the Japanese martial arts this is called ‘munen mushin’ or ‘mind, no mind’: when in danger there’s simply no time to think and you have to act instinctively. This is why semi-free or free exercises should be introduced as soon as possible: you won’t learn much if you keep practicing the same pre-arranged technique over and over again. This is why kata and other traditional approaches are all but useless in developing actual fighting ability. Fighting is chaos so in order to thrive in that chaos training should mirror that chaos as much as possible without compromising safety. It doesn’t even have to be full power, full speed sparring really (certainly not at first): lately what we’ve been practicing alot is an exercise consisting of one partner being the attacker who throws continuous straight and hook punches with medium speed: this teaches to defend on the fly and to recognise the type of attack he’s using. Later practice can be sped up, adding other strikes (uppercut…) and kicks. To me it’s great fun and even when you mess up (which of course never happens to me, lol) you still learn something. Aliveness really is the crux of meaningful, effective training which will elevate you above mere mimicking of techniques and technical perfection without much practical value.
I used to do those kinds of drills in Jujitsu class. They are a lot of fun and you learn quite a lot from them. They help you just react without thinking too much about things.
I agree with you on the aliveness in training. It’s one reason why I like Combatives, because much of the training is drills training, where anything can happen and you are forced to go with the flow of the situation.